Are there any sane people still awake? It is a real case of after The Lord Mayor’s show for ITV as they have the job of picking up the nation after the pain of an England defeat. It wasn’t that we deserved to lose – we played well in places – but it was that same sinking feeling that we would just pile on the “England expects” pressure onto the next “must win” game. In all of my prediction competitions, I had us losing to Italy, drawing with Uruguay and beating Costa Rica to go through. That was still a possibility. We were also flat because we had endured 90 minutes of Phil Neville, a voice that makes Noddy Holder’s sound interesting. I’d lost the will to drink anymore as well, with a bottle of Asahi Export and a Guinness Export in the fridge ready for this tie of Asia v Africa. Perhaps the second half would see me get a second wind.
1. Japanese socks – I know I keep banging on about socks but they have been a disappointment so far in the tournament. And then along comes the Japanese offering….BOOM. Who doesn’t love those multi-coloured beauties. The World Cup is alive and kicking. Perhaps a little Japanese flag on the back or even NIPPON written down the back of the calf? Or am I asking too much?
2. Make your mind up! – So is it Yaya Toure or Toure Yaya? Wilfred Bony or B. Wilfred? What are the rules on this? Does Rooney feel left out that he can’t have “Wayne” on his shirt? FIFA are too busy looking for corruption in Qatar to care about such important issues I bet!
3. Identikit – Having watched every game so far, the stadiums all look the same at pitch level. The camera-facing stands are set about 8ft above pitch level, the stewards seem the same, the TV cameraman look the same, they just shuffle the good-looking fans in the front row. I’m sure they all look outstanding in the flesh, but from a TV camera point of view it could all be in the same stadium, in any corner of the world.
4. Noise – Ten seconds into the game and the noise started. A constant piston-like sound that continued throughout the whole game. “You can hear the sound of the African drums tonight” commented the ITV commentator. At that moment you could just see the England band throw their instruments at the TV screens, knowing that they had been lied to. “Yeah, we asked FIFA and they said No”, so the FA told the band. Now they know that it was a cheap trick to stop them playing.
5. The New Rainham Steel – Coca-Cola, McDonalds, Sony, Emirates…check…#Allornothing – nice use of social media hash-tags. But Yingli Solar? Ever heard of them? No, neither have we. But they must have deep pockets or a Marketing Manager who is the best salesperson in the world. “Hey boss, what about we advertise our solar panels on TV?”. “Great idea Dave…what’s the cost?”. “A bargain at $500 million*”…”Wow, that means we would only have to sell 10 billion units to get our return on investment. Great work Dave.” Rainham Steel must be very jealous that someone else has claimed their mantle of “Company that everyone knows their name but no one knows what they do.”
Beer World Cup
2am is probably not the time to be tucking into Guinness Extra Strong Export but as it was for research we indulged. After a brief half-time snooze we couldn’t face the rest of the heavy stout so we moved onto the crisp Asahi. No surprises who won this battle…
Ivory Coast 1 Japan 3
The Kit World Cup – Day Three
Puma – 9pts
adidas – 6
Lotto – 3