Monthly Archives: June 2007

Tears and Tantrums and a penalty too far

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The Rise of the Big Green Monster – June 2007
Not exactly a 10,000 crowdIn my quest to fill the void left by the end of the football season I had planned a number of trips months in advance. Then something strange happened. Something that hadn’t happened for at least five years. England U21′s qualified for a major tournament. The U21′s used to be legends under the guidance of Peter Taylor and players like Rio Ferdinand, Paul Robinson, Frank Lampard and Jamie Carragher had all come through the “juniors” under his guidance. Then it all went wrong when the suits decided to replace the knowledgeable Taylor with the clueless David Platt. Under Mr Potato Head a system of squad rotation was introduced that seemed to mean any and every English player was capped at U21 level and consistency in team selection went out the window. After a couple of failed attempts at qualifying for the European Championships, which are held every 2 years, Platt was on his way to destroy Nottingham Forest, and Stuart Pearce was put in charge. Psycho relished the task and instilled a sense of pride in playing for the shirt again. A new crop of players started to gel as a team and all of a sudden the team starts to win. After a play off victory the team qualified for the 8 team European Championships to be played in Holland.

The U21 tournaments are normally well organised. Usually played in smaller stadiums close together and rarely very busy it is a stadium hoppers dream. And there is always the chance you will get to see a few stars in the making. Many players at this level also play once in their career at the Olympics level, which in terms of U21′s (well actually Under 23 at Olympic level) is the equivalent of the World Cup. Unfortunately we are allowed to play – something to do with the fact that we have professional leagues in England, Scotland and Ireland but don’t have a single team, or something like that. The 2007 version featured Portugal, Belgium, Israel, Italy, Serbia as well as the host nation and England. The games were to be played in four venues – two in the north – Groningen and Heerenveen and two in the south east, Arnhem and Nijmegen. England were drawn in the latter stadiums in a group featuring Italy, Serbia and Czech Republic. The opening games were being played in the north and it was to here that I was initially planning on visiting, taking in both games on the opening day.

I arrived at Amsterdam’s Schiphol airport on a sunny Saturday. I cannot think of a year where I have not landed at this airport more than once in a year. So bad was it in 2007 that I am sure I must have been under suspicion as a drug trafficker. The plan was to pick up a car at the airport, drive up to Heerenveen for the first game featuring the Dutch, leaving a few minutes early and continuing north to Groningen for Belgium v Portugal, staying the night in a small village outside Groningen before heading south on Sunday and taking in England’s opener in Arnhem and the game 10 miles away at Nijmegen. An overnight stop back in Arnhem then a drive to Amsterdam airport for a 7am flight back to work on the Monday. What could possibly go wrong? Absolutely everything.

Car hire is not what it is used to be. In the olden days they used to take a credit card imprint and then once you returned the car then it would be torn up in front of your eyes. Today they “block” a deposit from your card which basically means for the period of the rental (and actually for as long as they want to as I found out to my cost later in the year in Poland when it was blocked for three weeks) you cannot use the amount they have blocked. Fine if you have a credit card, but I don’t. My cash was all in my First Direct account, which is accessible by my Maestro card. The Netherlands is one of the few places in Europe where Maestro is not commonly accepted as I found out. I had only a few hundred on my Visa Debit (they wanted a deposit of €800) and being a Saturday I could not arrange a CHAPS transfer from one account to the other, neither would they take a cash deposit. So I was stuck. All my plans had disappeared down the drain. I had made such a fuss at the counter that I couldn’t try my luck elsewhere so I threw myself on the mercy of the Dutch rail network.

Unlike its German counterpart the Dutch network is in dire need of modernisation in terms of its trains meaning that it is not exactly the most comfortable to travel long distances. But, like its German counterpart it was very efficient and trains run regularly to all parts. So I headed down to the station under the arrivals area at Schiphol and caught a train northwards. The journey required a change in a small unremarkable station north of Amsterdam. Of course being the opening day of the biggest sporting tournament the country had held for 7 years (since Euro2000) coincided with the start of a major rail network improvement programme meaning there was no trains to Heerenveen. Brilliant – so plan B (formulated whilst waiting at unremarkable train station in middle of nowhere) kicked in. Head to Groningen, pick up Media accreditation for tournament, go to hotel, check in and get bus to Heerenveen in time for 1st game. Brilliant, except that I hadn’t bargained for the fact that the term Replacement Bus service reared its head…TWICE. So the 92 minute journey took over three hours. With an hour to kick off in Heerenveen I jumped in the nearest taxi (which turned out to be a brand new Chrysler – nice!) and negotiated for the driver to be my personal driver for the next few hours at the bargain cost of €150. So first stop was the stadium – known as the Big Green Cathedral. Groningen are one of the most progressive teams in Dutch football and many scoffed at them when they demolished their old stadium and built a brand new 20,000 arena on the outskirts of town complete with numerous leisure facilities including a casino, a number of restaurants and cinema. In their first season they averaged over 19,000 and vindicated the investment as the team qualified for the UEFA Cup by beating Feyenoord in a play off match.

I picked up my pass and asked how long it would take to get to Heerenveen. The officials scoffed at my plan and said “no chance”. I pointed out my vehicle outside and they seemed impressed, and I left with a good luck cheer. An accident on the motorway out of town meant we had to take a long detour to the village of Eelde where the hotel was, and the taxi had already run up nearly €70 so far so I decided to abandon the plan to get to the Netherlands game and relax for a few hours in the exquisite hotel. On far too many occasions when I travel I neglect to take time out, trying to cram in so much in so little time and coming back as tired as I was before I traveled. So I sat back with a beer and started watching the opening game from a very orange and full Abe Lenstra stadium in Heerenveen. A single goal was enough to start the hosts on the winning way but of course my plans had taken another wrong turn as I had got so relaxed that I had fallen asleep and not only missed 85 minutes of the game but also the bus I needed to get to the stadium. Another €20 for a taxi now saw my alternative travel arrangements total over €200 in a single day so far but at least I made it to the stadium.

The crowds weren’t exactly flocking to the stadium, and those that had made the effort to attend (it should be stated in the defence of the organisers that tickets were only €10) were in the colours of the Dutch and not of Portugal or Belgium. Inside the stadium the immediate thing you had to say it was very green. Every seat, surface, wall and roof was in the same green. Not exactly pleasing to the eye, and where they thought of the name the Green Monster was completely beyond me.
Officially over 7,000 saw a drab 0-0 which was only livened up with a huge fight in the second half when Manchester United-bound Nani pushed his histrionix too far with the Belgians and they took him down a peg or too. However, the crowd number did seem to be on the generous side as I would imagine there was no more than a quarter of that in the stadium. So two games down and only one goal scored – so much for a festival of free flowing football.

Groningen is not exactly a party town. It does has a large student population, but being mid-June the students had left for the summer. Which meant most bars and restaurants were closed. For christ sake it was a Saturday night! I gave up after half an hour of searching and headed back to the hotel (another €14) for dinner. Day one complete and absolutely nothing had gone to plan.

Sunday morning broke and the sun was shining. Families cycled up and down past the hotel whilst I waited for the buses for the station. Of course, this being Sunday I failed to read the timetable correctly that showed that I had already missed the only bus of the day to the town centre, which left at 7.30am. So another taxi, another €10 and I was off to civilisation in the historic town of Arnhem. Only three train changes and three hours left and I arrived in the town that was made famous in the Second World War for the story that lead to the film of A Bridge Too Far. England were in town and unsurpisingly the support was magnificant. Thousands had made their way over to Holland for this game against the Czech Republic and hopes were high under the guidance of Stuart Pearce. The team were captained by Nigel Reo-Coker who was in the process of making himself 35,000 enemies for life by bad mouthing West Ham in an attempt to broker a move to Aston Villa. Also in the team was failed pathetic gansta wallabee Anton Ferdinand, Preston scoring machine David Nugent and Reading striker Leroy Lita. One notable absence was David Bentley who had pulled out of the squad the day after being on the bench for the full international with Brazil, stating he was “too tired” to play for the Under21′s. What a tosser. This one decision shows all that is wrong with young footballers today. Happy to act like Billy Big Balls when they want but given the opportunity they will shirk their responsibilities. A number of fans and journalists, myself included, called for him to never represent his country again.

The Gelredome was one of the most futuristic stadiums when it opened in late 1999. It was an ambitious project undertaken by the president of Vitesse Arnhem when his team were one of the most progressive in Dutch football. The stadium was the first to be cashless (similar with Amsterdam ArenA and Schalke’s Veltins ArenA) and the first to have a pitch that rolled out of the stadium on rollers meaning that it could be quickly converted into an indoor arena. For this game England had been given the whole of the north end of the stadium and came close to filling it. In keeping with the games the previous day excitement was on holiday and England toiled to a 0-0 draw although a missed penalty by Lita in the final few minutes would have sealed 3 points if his aim had been true. I had actually left by this point, heading 10 miles south to watch the Serbia v Italy game in the tiny town of Nijmegen. The 13,000 seater stadium is located in the town centre in a nice park and the locals had come out in force, taking most of the seats although there were a surprising number of Serbian fans in the 8,000 crowd. Another dull game was on the cards with Serbia scoring the only goal of the game in the middle of the second half. With all eight teams having played their opening game I can honestly say it had been one of the most disappointing tournaments on record. I headed back to my hotel in Arnhem annoyed at the fact I had spent over £400 on a weekend of three games of dull uninspiring football, tedious traveling and jobsworth car hire companies when I could have blown the whole lot in Amsterdam and had a silly grin on my face for weeks to come, and also told a much more interesting story that this one dear readers!

The tournament did liven up slightly. The Netherlands qualified for the semi-finals with a win in their second game in the Euroborg at Groningen, with rising star Ryan Babel proving to be the man of the tournament so far. They were joined by Portugal, Serbia and England, after the latter had beaten Italy and Serbia. The game against the Serbians had descended into the dark old days of football when some of the Serbians had racially abused Ferdinand and Lita at the end of the game. UEFA, as usual, with punishments like expulsion at their fingertips chose to give them 10 hail mary’s.

In the semi-final Netherlands and England could not be separated over 120 minutes and so it went to one of the most extraordinary penalty shoots out of all time. A total of 32 penalties were taken in front of a sell out 23,000 crowd making it the longest penalty shoot out in first class European games. It took an Anton Ferdinand miss 34 minutes after the shoot out started to settle the game and send the Dutch into the final where they eventually beat Serbia 4-1. A cracking end to a disappointing tournament and one I would never forget for the wrong reasons – when travel does go wrong it really does go wrong…Roll on Sweden in 2007.

About The Euroborg
When plans were initially published for a brand new multi-purpose stadium in Groningen for the then Second Division club, many people wondered what the point was. The old Oosterpark stadium, which stood on the same spot as the Euroborg, was a small intimate stadium which had a capacity of just over 11,000 and was known for the closeness of the crowd to the action. However, it was really showing signs of aging in the early part of this century – having been constructed in 1933.

The new stadium was constructed next door to the Oosterpark from late 2004 until its opening in January 2006. The 19,980 capacity may have seemed ambitious at first, but last season the stadium was full on almost every occasion proving that if you do build it they will come. It certainly is an impressive venue both inside and out. Around the perimeter of the stadium you will find a health spa, supermarket, chinese restaurant, cinema and a casino – converting the stadium into a true 7 day venue. Inside the stadium is a simple 2 tier uniform arena, with a double row of executive boxes in the upper tier of the main stand. Views are very good from all parts, although the presence of a perimeter fence does hinder the first few rows of the lower tier. The stadium certainly lives up to its Groene tag with all of the seats a bright green colour. The concourses are wide and provide plenty of space for people buying refreshments as well as allowing fans to watch the game from behind the seated areas.

Who plays there?
The Groene Kathedraal (The Green Cathedral) is the new home to one of the Netherlands’ most ambitious clubs FC Groningen. The team weren’t actually formed until 1971 but have made some massive strides, playing the majority of their existence in the top flight of Dutch football.

Their most famous ex-players are Ronald and Erwin Koeman who were the heart of the side in the heart of the 1980′s, a period where the club played European football for the first time. Their success has always been very modest – they still have not won a major honour yet – their best league position was 3rd in 1991.

In 2006 they finished fifth in the league, meaning that they earnt the right to fight for Champions League qualification. In a tense match versus Ajax they eventually went down by a single goal. Last season they qualified for the UEFA Cup again, although a disappointing 4-3 defeat to Partizan Belgrade was not the welcome the new stadium was hoped to bring the club. In 2006/07 the club finished in 8th place, and qualified for the forthcoming UEFA Cup competition, beating Feyenoord and Utrecht in the domestic qualifying competition.

How to get there
The Euroborg is located in the south east of the city centre, next to the A7/E22 motorway. The area around the stadium is under development with such amenities as a health spa and casino already constructed, and a hotel due to be added in the next year or so. From the old town and train station it is a pleasant 20 minute walk. Simply follow Trompsingel eastwards until you reach the bridge over the canal, then turn right and follow Winschoterdiep southwards along the canal. Once you pass under the E22 ring road the stadium will be in front of you – although you will need to walk around the office block. Alternatively, use bus number 20 that runs from the bus station next to the central station and drops you right outside the stadium. Journey time is around 5 minutes.

Getting a ticket
FC Groningen’s attendances have risen dramatically over the past few seasons, co-inciding with the upturn in fortunes on the pitch. In the 2005/06 season the rise was over 30% to 15,500 and included 3 sell outs, whereas last season the average rose to close to 19,180 meaning that tickets for most games were in short supply.

With European competition returning to the Euroborg again in 2007, tickets will be in demand for most games. This means pre-booking is absolutely essential to avoid disappointment. The club does allow foreign fans to book tickets in advance – contact them at info@fcgroningen.nl. Last season tickets ranged in price from €20 in the Eerste Ring to €40 in the main stand. Tickets for the seats behind the goal were sold out last season to members.

Getting around
The centre of Groningen is very compact and walking is really the only option. Buses radiate from the central station, with a €2.40 three strip ticket enough to take you out to the countryside around Paterswolde. For central journeys then the fare is €1 – payable to the driver on boarding the bus.

Local Hotels & Bars
Whilst the city is relatively modest in terms of population size, it does attract people from the surrounding region and so a night out in the city is often a quite loud affair. It does not have a wide range of hotels, but the ones that are here are good value and nearly always have vacancies. The tourist office in Grote Markt can assist if you are struggling to find anywhere to stay.

Eden City Hotel – Gedempte Kattendiep 25
Tel: +31 50 588 6565 http://www.edenhotelgroup.com
Nh Hotel de Ville – Oude Boteringestraat 43
Tel: +31 50 318 1222 http://www.nh-hotels.com
Golden Tulip Paterswolde – Groningerweg 19
Tel +31 50 309 5400 http://www.goldentulip.com

Groningen is a student city and so you will find plenty of places to eat and drink that will not break the bank. The following restaurants are well worth trying to seek out and visit whilst you are here.

D’Ouwe Brandweer – Gedempte Zuiderdiep (+31 50 318 0323)
The Charthouse – Schuitendiep 78 (+31 50 312 1666)
En Zo – Poelestraat 53 (+31 50 313 6258)

Most of the nightlife is based in the streets around Grote Markt in the old town. Whilst you wont find the kind of frentic activity as you see in Amsterdam or Rotterdam. There are some nice bars where you can spend an hour or two at the pace you want, such as:-

De Eerste Kamer – Peperstraat 9
De Jongens Van de Witt Cafe – Gelkingestraat 56
Heminway’s Bar – Gdempte Kattendiep 23

If you need to find a bar to watch some action from back home then Groningen does have a couple of Irish Bars that show both Sky Sports and Setanta Sports. They are:-

O’Ceallaigh – Gdempte Kattendiep 13
Sally O’Brien’s – Oosterstraat 33

Nearest Airport – Groningen Eelde Airport (GRQ)
Telephone: +31 50 308 13 00
Website: http://www.gae.nl

The very small Groningen Eelde airport is located in the heart of the stunning village of Paterswolde, around 5 miles south of the city centre. It is only served by a handful of operators – Ryanair used to fly here but recently cut the route as it was not reaching its strict capacity levels.

Currently, BMI fly daily from Aberdeen, VLM once a day from London City via Amsterdam and KLM from Norwich. To reach the city centre from the airport, catch the twice hourly 52 bus that terminates at the central station. A single will cost €2.40 and the journey takes around 40 minutes. A taxi will cost around €30.

 

Football only politer

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In my quest to see a game in every country in Europe I had cruelly missed Sweden off my agenda for far too long. In the early part of this century the Oresund bridge/tunnel opened to a great fanfare, linking Copenhagen to Malmo in one swish structure, and in the process joining two arch enemies together. Denmark and Sweden are so similar in many ways, but they will never admit it. They are all blonde and blue eyed, they have the same (type) of currency, they love a beer and they are both prohibitively expensive. Relations between them have soured over the past few weeks after the Euro 2008 qualifying game in Copenhagen in June 2007 when a Danish fan attacked the referee and he abandoned the game – why oh why didn’t someone do that to Graham Poll years ago!

Anyway, with another work trip to Copenhagen in the diary, a swift look on UEFA.com found an opportunity to “hop across the pond” – FC Malmo v Halmstad. Malmo is almost visible from Copenhagen – a silhouette in the distance, past the nuclear power station. Sleepy little Malmo….Coming over the Oresund Bridge you are immediately hit with how neat and tidy things are in Sweden. That is not to say that Copenhagen is messy – but the huge amount of redevelopment in the city has meant that the presence of cranes and building sites does tend to obscure the image of “Wonderful Copenhagen”. Well manicured lawns, the absence of any grafetti and pedestrians and cyclists alike waiting for red lights to change was certainly an eye opener.

However, we were here to check out the football scene in Sweden, and a drive past the iconic Malmo stadium 90 minutes before kick off didn’t fill us with confidence that it was a hotbed of football. In fact the presence of a team coach was the only visible sign a game was going to start soon. Even the bars close by were empty..Having been told by everyone in Denmark that the beer is Sweden was “expensive” – and that is coming from people who do not bat an eye at paying £5 for a pint, we had to go into a complex fag-packet calculation for a workable exchange rate (trying to change Swedish Kroner into Danish Kroner into Sterling is not the easiest thing to do) to find out a beer was 45p, or was it £4.50?? However, a couple of pints soon put us in the football mood, and being typically English we waited until two minutes before kick off for the 5 minute walk, only realising it was more like a 20 minute hike.

However, with very little atmosphere in the stadium we made an assumption that they must be waiting for us to double the attendance. A bargain 110 Swedish Kroner (£8 or £80) got us through the turnstiles to be met with a crowd of over 18,000 – where had everyone come from?? And where was the noise? Down one side of the stadium the Malmo fans stood shoulder to shoulder underneath their flags with slogans like “Malmo Massive” and “No One Likes Us” (being in Sweden where everyone is so polite you almost expected a sign underneath saying something like “and that is really upsetting”), politely clapping when something exciting happened.

The stadium is certainly unique in design. Built for the 1958 World Cup Finals, it has lots of curves and corners – the main stand looks like a huge white wave from a distance. Behind each goal there was a bank of terracing, set back from the pitch by an athletics track. Whilst the stadium was busy, the ends were empty and we delighted in the fact that beer was being served from an open bar. Now this being a football match with “hardcore” fans you would have expected queues around the block. But not here.  Everyone seemed happy to sit and watch the game so we took the opportunity to have a beer and a burger.  Great plan except the burgers were organic reindeer ones and the beer was non-alcoholic.  Alex was inconsolable.  Not only was it his first match but we had promised real beer.  He saw through our ruse in a flash and started remonstrating with anyone and everyone.

The football was pedestrian to say the least.  The visitors Kalmar came to Malmo sitting on top of the table and they looked more like league leaders than Malmo who seemed content in playing the ball around the midfield without any idea as to how to break down the Kalmar defence. With 15 minutes on the clock the visitors took the lead with a well worked free kick from the edge of the penalty area.

Five minutes after the break it was 2-0 as Kalmar beat a non-existent offside trap and made light work of a 3 v 2 situation.  On that note Alex headed back to the bar,only to return looking shocked a few minutes later…”They have run out of beer” he stammered.  Whilst it wasn’t real beer, he could at least pretend but now that avenue of pleasure had been closed to.  There was only one thing left to do, as by now the noise he was making, like a smackhead being told that the methadone had now run out, was waking up the locals.  We headed for the exit and back to the central station where we managed to get a final beer in Finnigans Sports Bar before it closed (at 9pm!) and then onto civilisation across the Oresund in Denmark.  Too much of a bad thing is good for you but when it is all so polite it is hard to stomach.  “Next time” Alex vowed “we do things my way”…judging by his nickname of Dr Colonic I will make sure our traveling plans are separate for a few months at least!

How to get there
The stadium is located south of the main city centre, in a very green residential area. It is a 20 minute walk from the central station, or around 10 minutes from the bus station. Bus number 2 runs close to the stadium, although these get very busy before the game. A taxi from the central station will cost around 75Skr.

Getting a ticket
Whilst attendances are on the up at the Mälmo Stadion, there are still plenty of spaces for those turning up to pay on the gate. The average attendance over the past few seasons has been around the 14,000 mark, making them the second best supported team in the Allsvenskan behind AIK. Tickets can be bought in advanced from the website http://www.ticnet.se. Tickets range in price from 200SKR in the upper tier of the main stand to 125SKR behind the goal on the terraces. At the gate these prices are reduced to 180SKR and 110SKR respectively. The main Mälmo fans congregate on the terraces of the lower side stand. If you are watching an early evening game then it may be best to avoid the main stand due to the issues caused by the setting sun.

Getting around
The city centre is relatively small and it is easier to walk than wait for the local buses. Trains run to the outskirts of the city, and on to places such as Trelleborg and Helsingborg. A new railway tunnel is being constructed under the city centre at the moment that will alleviate some of the congestion in the city centre.

Local Hotels & Bars
The opening of the Øresund Bridge has given a new lease of life to the city of Mälmo. Whilst it has always been known as a pretty little city, the influx of visitors from across the water has lead to increased investment, and the general tidy up of the major areas. In the summer the city is a great place to visit, and like many Scandinavian cities, there are loads of outdoor activities that attract families to spend time here. The tourist office in the central station is a good starting point for new arrivals to find their bearings, as well as finding a hotel room if you haven’t found one before arriving. The following are good options if you have a chance to book one before you travel. They can be contacted on +46 40 34 1200. Elite Hotel Savoy – Norra Vallgatan 62Tel: +46 40 66 44 850 http://www.elite.seRica Hotel – Stortorget 15Tel: +46 40 660 95 50 http://www.rica-hotels.comRadisson SAS Hotel – Ostergatan 10Tel: +46 40 698 40 00 http://www.sas.radisson.comSweden is not known for its contribution to world cuisine, but it does have a few good places to eat. Unsurprisingly fish and seafood feature heavily on most menus. The following are all highly recommended if you have a chance to visit.

Rådhuskällaren – Stortorget 1 (Tel: +46 40 79020)
Hipp – Kalendegatan 12 (Tel: +46 40 974 030)
Smak – St Johnannesgatan 7 (Tel: +46 40 505035)

In terms of bars, then head for the area around Lilla Torg where most of the action takes place. Here you will find a mix of trendy cafes, laid back bars, traditional pubs and nightclubs. The following are three good options for various points in the evening.

Kulturbolaget – Bergsgaten 18
Brogatan – Brogatan 12
Caramello – Stortorget 25

If you are in need of a place to watch some Premiership football then head for the following bars in town that show games all weekend long from around Europe.

The Bishops Arms – Norra Vallgatan 62
The Pickwick – Malmborgsgatan 5
Paddy’s – Kalendegatan 7

Nearest Airport – Kastrup Copenhagen (CPH)

Telephone: +45 3231 3231

Website: http://www.cph.dk

Despite being in a different country, Copenhagen’s main airport is the nearest airport, located around 15 miles to the west of Mälmo across the Øresund Bridge. It has three terminals – two dedicated to international and intercontinental flights, and the remote Terminal 1 is dedicated to internal flights. Easyjet are the main budget carrier to fly to Copenhagen. They fly here daily from London Stansted. BA and SAS also fly here from London Heathrow. Snowflake, SAS’s budget brand fly twice daily from London City. Sterling are Denmark’s biggest Budget airline – they fly three times a day from London Gatwick.To get to Mälmo from Kastrup airport, simply catch one of the three trains per hour from the station under terminal 3. The journey time is 23 minutes and you need a train from track 1. A single ticket costs around £8. A bus also runs from the airport costing 100DKr.

Other Airport – Mälmo Sturup Airport (MMX)

Telephone: +46 40 613 10 00

Website: http://www.lvf.se

Ryanair fly into Malmö’s small and compact Sturup airport. Despite the fact that the airport is located across the water in Sweden, the completion of the Øresund Bridge, means the two countries are now permanently linked. It is approximately 17 miles from the city centre. Buses link the airport to the city centre, taking around 40 minutes.

Pretty Girls and Sunburnt Men

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Tallinn is such a wonderful place. In the summer it has everything for a perfect evening – cheap and plentiful beer, excellent steak restaurants, almost constant sunshine and of course some of the most beautiful women in the world. Whilst Bratislava may slightly nudge it in terms of overall prettiness, the Estonians have the right attitude – full of smiles, winks and those little nudges that give us old blokes some hope that our boat has come in. So, when the draw was made for the European Championships, and Tallinn came up as an option for England in June it was a trip that no red blooded man to resist.

However, there were two main problems….Firstly, as you will have read, dear subscriber, from my earlier posts that the stadium in Tallinn is small. And England, now replenished with Mr Beckham, are a big big draw. Therefore, in a theory created by Newton you can determine that small stadium x Huge English Following x Massive local interest = f all tickets. Interest was huge from day one – the one daily flight with Easyjet soon went through the roof….What I find amazing with their pricing model is that it pays no attention to simple Economics. Sure, I realise the principal that seat prices will go up as demand increases, but there is a limit at which people will not pay for that seat – in this case it was the ludicrous £349 return. It is very easy to see when this limit is reached as that flight permanently had a return available….Other options included Estonia Air but as a flag carrier again pricing was ludicrous…..

So, the usual bartering of stories started on the forums – £x via Amsterdam, £y via Berlin and so on. Well, I was in a lucky position. By leaving my flight as late as possible I managed to get a return from Copenhagen for just £43! With worth picking up my Stansted return to the city now known as CPH I was able to take a 1/2 day leave and keep my fingers crossed for a ticket. 740 seats were made available, after the football family and in a move to stop “cap fraud” – of which the vast majority of England Fans felt us top cappers were guilty of, tickets had to be collected on the day of the game….I was lucky (just by my calculations – but then again I have written nice things about the FA in the past)….

So, there’s the background….Landing at Tallinn’s tiny airport at 6pm I had 3 hours to get into the city, drop my bag off and then head on off down to the stadium. No big drinking sessions for me on this trip – a functional trip without any frills. After the taxi had dropped us in the city centre, we walked through the perfect old town square (2 Irish Bars, 1 Indian restaurant, 3 Strip/Lap dancing clubs)…The strong sunshine highlighted the array of St George’s crosses but the ironic “No Surrender’s” were for once missing from the terrraces of Molly Malones. A swift half (well 0.5 litres is a half here) was in order, just to see how the locals were warming to the English. There was certainly a fine selection of waiting staff happy to enjoy the banter with the fans. The hotel I was staying at, the Kalev Waterpark was in fact a small hotel tacked on a big swimming pool. I had come prepared with my shorts – but alas the Estonian world was denied the chance to see the infamous Fuller legs by a Speedo-only rule.

The stadium is a 25 minute walk south of the city centre, and with me being “Billy no mates” on this trip (as they didn’t have enough caps) I headed down early doors to collect my ticket. Rumours had been circulating that tickets had been selling on the black market for over £100 – meaning the likelihood of a 50% + England showing in the crowd was going to be high….What was even funnier though was the lengths some England Fans were going to to try and convince the FA that they had a genuine claim to a ticket….”My mate is stuck in a taxi – he said for me to pick it up”…..”It is me – I changed my name by deed poll”…”My mate has amnesia”…and so on – it was obviously a concern for the FA who had heavies on the gates as well as the unusual measure of having our membership photos on the ticket envelopes.

As I have described before, dear readers, the stadium is a small but impressive arena. England has been allocated the only open end, and 5 rows of temporary seating meant that I had an excellent seat just behind the goal…..Unfortunately the lack of a roof, and the small following from England’s most loyal meant one thing – a shit atmosphere. The evidence of the flags around the ground showed the ingenuity (is that a word?) of the England fans in obtaining tickets – but the cries from the home fans of “Emile Heskey” or so it sounded were wide of the mark – unless they thought he had dieted, and shrunk by 6 inches to become Ledley King!!!!

The match was dull…Beckham again proved to be McLaren’s saviour with 2 assists, although all three goals in the 3-0 win would have been preventable in the Premiership. The defeat meant that Estonia had lost all 7 game sto date and were still to score a goal – I am sure the meeting versus Andorra is well anticipated!

After the game the fans streamed northwards back to the city centre in fading sunlight – at 11.30pm!!! With so many bars, and so many pretty women for many the night would be long….unfortunately for me the night was all too short as I forfeited my right to sleep to get a flight back to Copenhagen to be at my desk for 8am….Still, life can never be perfect!!!

Three countries in 10 minutes – and all for a €1 – Bargain!

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Sometimes these trips go wrong. Not spectacularly wrong (yet, touch wood, fingers crossed etc) but wrong…It seems not matter of complex planning on routes, travel, weather and people can sometimes prepare you for the issues that you can face. As I am sure you have read so far, dear reader, I am prone to the occasional oversight or mistake – however so far it has not cost me dear. This trip was another example of when things go wrong, but end up all right. The plan here was very simple – visit the Ernst Happel Stadium in Vienna to see Austria play Paraguay in a friendly. After all, the stadium is a favourite with UEFA and will host the 2008 European Championship Final. It is also the only UEFA 4 star venue I have not seen a game in. Added to this a journey that took me via Slovakia into Austria and I thought I would pay a visit to some of the more well known Stadia in Bratislava for future research.

Ryanair’s daily flight to Bratislava (or Vienna as they refer to it in some material – after all its only 50 miles away AND IN A DIFFERENT COUNTRY!) is one of the first to depart Stansted airport. But how wrong you would be in thinking at nobody would be at the airport at 4.30am. In fact I would wager that the 2 hours from 4.30am to 6.30am are the busiest period in terms of numbers of people in the terminal during the day. Gone are the days when you would be one of a handful of people on the flight as well – as with flights to the exotic destinations of Brno, Kaunas and Lodz (Czech Republic, Lithuania and Poland to the uninitiated) the flight was over 80% full.

Fast forward two hours and we were touching down in another new country – country 43 by my reckoning. Then came the first problem. Whilst many of the smaller airports have tried as much as possible to “integrate” the arrival of airplanes full of Brits with bulging wallets, Bratislava gave the impression it couldn’t care. In fact I do not think I saw a smiling person all day in the country of Slovakia. You arrive into what can be simply described as a small atrium once you have passed via customs. There are no signs in English to direct you anywhere. Through a process of deduction I would a bus stop, where the trice-hourly bus ran into town. Tickets were by coin payment only….So how do you get coins….The bloke in teh small kiosk next to the bus stop wouldn’t change Euro’s, the only exchange place in the airport was closed, and the cash machine only gave notes…So what do you do? Well, if it was only me I would walk around and around until I found the solution. When there are 30 or 40 people in the same boat, you simply get on the bus and keep quiet!

The bus took us around the airport commercial centre, a place that would do the likes of Bluewater and Lakeside proud – an Ikea, M&S, Nike, Next and a host of other big name shops lined the streets – contrasted by the huge industrial manufacturing chimneys in the background. Then I noticed something….Whilst the place was busy with Saturday morning shoppers, no-one appeared to be carrying any bags – so is it that people come here to window shop before trudging back to their gloomy industrial tower blocks, or do they save it all up for a power spending spree later in the day.

Anyway, my first stop was the Tehlene Pole Stadium – home to Slovan Bratislava, Art Media’s European matches and the national team. It was here in 2003 that the England fans and players alike were racially abused in an incident that was swept under the table by UEFA. Like many such stadiums in Europe at weekends, they are free to enter and even go and play a game on the pitch (although remembering that gun laws here are different, and the conversation with the security patrols may be a tad different to those in Croydon). The stadium is similar in design to Dinamo Moscow’s – one large two tier stand sitting over the three remaining stands – only one of which offers cover from the cruel Slovakian weather. It can hardly be called atmospheric….If you are thinking of watching a game here then catch the Bus 61 from the main station. A ticket (if you can be bothered) will cost 14SKr.

Almost across the road is the Inter stadium – simply exit the Tehelme Pole stadium to the south, turn right and after 200 yards you will see it across the road. Again, the stadium was opened and I was able to freely wander in. The stadium was similar in design to the Tehelme Pole – although the running track was hardly a bonus. What I do not understand with these stadiums in countries where the weather is a little chilly and wet why on earth do they not build roofs??? Direction are as per the Tehelme Pole stadium.

I blagged my way onto a tram this time – full of smiling locals. Now, if we had the quality of women on our trains from New Eltham to London Bridge in the morning I doubt if anyone would complain about standing up….But they just didn’t want to smile…The sun was shining, it was the weekend and they were stunning – but a pair of sunglasses and a frown is not a good look. After a brief walk through the old town – very picturesque, full of British Stag do’s and more than its fair share of “Club xxx” type establishments, I headed over the Danube to find the last stadium on my list – the Art Media Stadium. The club have come to prominence in the past few seasons after some amazing performances in Europe. In 2005 they almost reached the knock-out stages of the Champions League, finally putting out holders Porto to earn a place in the UEFA Cup. The stadium isn’t fit to hold European games – it has no floodlights, although it is a popular concert venue and has hosted Sting and the Scorpions in the past few months. Again, the stadium was open for all to wander in. In fact the team were having a training session ahead of an end of season tournament, and with a cold beer in hand it was the perfect place for a 30 minute break. The stadium is quite similar to some of those you will find in the UK – with three identical stands forming a horseshoe, and one old stand sitting like a sore thumb..The stadium is easily reached from the old town – either by foot (walk across the old bridge across the Danube) or by Bus number 50.

From there I had to walk to the South Station – in an exotic neighbourhood called Petrazalka. Hindsight is a wonderful things, and with it I would have known that Petrazalka means “the biggest council estate in Europe”….not the best place to be walking around with a map and my England track suit top on. But I am not one to miss a shortcut and so straight through the middle I ploughed. Whilst it doesn’t compete with some of the areas in Madrid or Barcelona for poverty (believe me there is real poverty in those places if you want to look for it), it was rough…gangs of youths couldn’t believe seeing me brazenly walk through their “hood” and I can only assume that I survived because they assumed I was some kind of bait from a rival bigger gang. The wierdest thing was that on the edge of the ghetto, the local authorities seemed to have made up for the fact that Slovakia is landlocked by placing a seaside resort there – except the sand and sea. You know the type of buildings, smart flats with balconies, wide “boulevards” with trees and pavement restaurants….Surprisingly no one was eating despite it being 1pm and 25 degrees.

Finally I reached the station in one piece and booked my €8 ticket to Vienna – total journey time of 59minutes. In order to board the trains you need to pass via passport control – technically you are emigrating to another state – although the concept of free travel within EU states must have missed the authorities. Now the great thing about the train is that in the space of 10 minutes you pass from Slovakia, into Hungary before crossing into Austria – as there were stations in all 3 I make it that for less than €1 you can pass between the three countries.

My plan on arriving in Vienna was similar to Bratislava. Check out a couple of the bigger club stadiums before heading over the Ernst Happel in the Prater Park for the game at 5pm. I had concocted a fiendishly simple itiniary that would see me do 5 stadiums in 3 hours……Unfortunately the closure of the main S-Bahn line around the city for maintenance meant that plan 1 had gone out of the window. I decided to change to Plan 2 and within 20 minutes was confidently trying to find an open gate at the stadium of FK Austria Wacker – the current Austrian cup holders located on the main ring road around the city, and a short hop from the 67 Tram. Unfortunately, my luck ran out and I couldn’t find a way in. So onto stadium 2 – the Gerald Haneppi Stadium – home to Vienna’s biggest club – Rapid Vienna. A bus and a U-Bahn ride later and I walked out into the sunshine to find fans. Not one or two, but hundreds. It was 3.30pm – 1 1/2 hours before the national team played – and on the wrong side of town. Undeterred, and under a false assumption that they were here for any other reason that I had screwed up, I marched down the road. As each step hit the ground I realised with more confidence that this small stadium (c.19,000) was in fact the venue for the game – and not as I had planned my whole trip around, the national stadium. Now it wasn’t a disaster – I had been worried I would not have enough time to enjoy my media accreditation and the facilities that go with it – but I had meticulously planned the trip to visit the Ernst Happel Stadium, and tick off another Euro 2008 venue. Still, having picked up my pass and grabbed a free beer, a free burger and a free Rapid Vienna fans pack I settled into my padded seat in the stadium to watch the match.

Despite this being a national team match, the media area was sparsely populated. It was very evident from recently friendly results, and the confidence within the press that if it wasn’t for hosting the tournament, there would be no chance of this team competing on an international stage. They huffed and puffed to a 0-0 draw against the South Americans with ex-Sunderland and Chelsea keeper Jurgen Macho the man of the match. I decided not to stay for the press conference afterwards – my German and Spanish are not exactly fluent so hopped back on my tri-country train trip.

I should have said earlier than I managed to change €50 into 1600 Slovakian Krones. I have not got a clue want this equates to but it had paid for lunch, 3 beers, a book on Slovakian football, a one day transport pass and a return train trip to Vienna. So after clearing immigration back into Slovakia I weighed up if I had enough to get a taxi to the airport. My negotiation went like this…”Airport – How Much”….”Airport-yes we have airport”….”I know but how much to get there”….”No bus there only taxi”….”Yes I know how much”….”Five Hundred”……”Three hundred is that right?”….”No 400″…and so off we went at breakneck speed. There was still a pot of Krones left for a pizza, a beer and some water…..

A long and tiring day – made all the better by Ryanair’s fantastic punctuality record (34 minutes late), and of course the standing joke that is the way Immigration at Stansted airport work completely opposite shifts to when the flights arrive – after all we all love waiting in line for 30 minutes at 1am just to get back into our own country.

Bratislava – The Facts

The Tehelne Pole Stadium
Junacka 2, Bratislava 83104
Capacity: 30,087 All seater

The ground is located around 4.5km north east of the city centre in the Nove Mesto area. The stadium is easily reached by public transport from the city centre. The national stadium is home to Slovan Bratislava, as well as the venue for Artmedia’s European games. During the 2005 Champions League campaign, the pitch bore the brunt of the poor late Autumnal weather, and became almost unplayable in the game versus Porto. With only one covered stand, a space on the open end is not quite as appealing in the cold wet winter than in the barmy spring and summer.

How to get a ticket for the Tehelne Pole Stadium
For all domestic club games tickets are available on the day of the game. Average attendances for Slovakian football is less than 4,000 and so you will have no problem in getting a ticket for a match from either the main ticket office, or direct at the turnstiles. For big European games then information on when the tickets go on sale are posted on the club’s own websites.

The Stadium – The Pasienky Stadium
Vajnorksá 100, Bratislava
Capacity: 13,295 All seater

Very similar in design to the National Stadium, with one single covered stand, an athletics track and curved ends behind the goals, the Pasienky stadium is showing its age. Home attendances rarely hit the 3,000-mark meaning that it lacks real atmosphere.

How to get to the Pasienky Stadium
The stadium is a stone’s throw away from the Tehelme Pole Stadium to the north east of the city centre. Buses 38, 103, 113 and 118 run from the city centre to the ground. Alternatively, catch the metro to Nové Mesto station and then complete the journey by foot.

How to get a ticket for the Pasienky Stadium
Tickets for any game at the Pasienky are available on the day of the match, including those for the big inter city derbies between Slovan, Inter and Art Media. For big European nights, expect the ticket prices to double or even treble. Tickets for a normal league game start from just €8 for a place on a terrace. A posh seat will set you back around €20. Tickets can be bought on the day of the game from the booths along the Vajnorska main road.

Around the Pasienky Stadium
The stadium sits in parkland and a residential area. Around the stadium there is very little in terms of refreshment areas, although on a match day a number of temporarily bars set up shop and sell their wares. With the proximity to the stadium it is best to stick to the city centre for your pre-match drinking.